All of my life I have been a hard working and dedicated student. But lately, as college application time has rolled around for seniors I've wondered if most of the work was worth it. I have found myself stuck between a rock and a hard place with grades and money. Since eighth grade I have known that I loved Elon University but the price was unbearable for my family to pay off. I have also been determined to get into UNC-Chapel Hill since I was young, but the school is highly competitive and often good grades are not enough to get accepted.
These two things, grades and money, have led me to a certain apathetic feeling towards my classes this year. I've put everything I could into school my whole life and yet somehow it's not enough. At this point, most AP classes I took do not seem worth the time. All the hours I spent stressing over tests, projects, and homework, all the nights I got back from sports and stayed up until into the middle of the night to do work, all the the days I skipped doing fun activities so I could do more school work; none of it seems worth it.
I have seen my friends have breakdowns, crushed under the unbearable weight of perfection that the world seems to expect from students. We do everything within our power to please our teachers, colleges, and parents but yet it seems it is never enough. Some of my teachers have told me, “I know what you are going through,” or “I can see it from your point of view,” but it is almost impossible for them to imagine what each of us is really up against. Students go to school for seven hours and then are asked to go home and do even more school work. I can assume that no matter what I’ll have at least two hours of homework a night. How are students supposed to be well rounded if we do not have time to keep a job, do a sport, gain an internship, or have any other extracurricular activity? The expectations of students is constantly being raised so that even young teachers can not relate to us anymore.
I am not trying to tell my fellow students to not try at school but rather do not push yourself too hard. Have fun and do what you think will matter to you more the next day. If that is going to a movie with your friends, then by all means do it. But if what matters is homework, then by all means do that. This is advice I wish I had been given when I was a freshman. Here I am, as a senior, and I am completely burnt out. I used to have passion for learning but now that light inside me has faded. I have been accepted into college and that is something to be proud of, but its not a dream school, at least not my dream school. Knowing I may not get into the universities that I have worked for my entire high school career for is heart-wrenching.
Something about our education system needs to change. Students who work hard should be rewarded with classes that push them intellectually, not ones that just give extra work on the same curriculum everyone learns. Part of the apathy that comes from students is the fact that we are bored in our classes because we already know what we are learning or we are just given busy work to make the class “challenging.” If students were given intellectual and specialized class options plus a flexible schedule they would be able to explore their passion before they even get to college. This would also help students find a college that suits their needs and give them an advantage on being accepted.
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